Day 508. Cobblestone roads (Anna)
We arrived to you after a rather bad hospital birth experience. Before this experience happened to us (in passive form, as we did not do anything, it happened to us), we didn’t think that we should choose such a circumstantial preparation – at least it seemed circumstantial at the time – for this elementary event of giving birth (even though several friends suggested it then). We trusted that I, being a woman, can handle this basic function of giving birth. Today we see it as infinite naivety and lack of hospital experience, that we thought that they let and help the birth happen, and don’t interfere in different ways, for which we paid a huge price: our first daughter was taken out of my body, just so she would see the daylight during the doctors duty hours (the 1000 watts in the operation room). I don’t want to go into more details, it’s not the topic now, but it lead to a difficult period and it was the reason why we decided that we will go for the second birth only with You, with Your help.
The labor with Anna (our second daughter) started on the 19th in the evening. I didn’t recognize it, we put the older daughter to sleep at home, but I called you and told you that I am a bit sleepy and have pain in my waist from time to time. You asked us why did we put Klara to sleep at home (the older daughter), this is the start of labor. Peter took her over to my mother, which we already practiced before, because I feared that it will be difficult for me to ask the two year old not to expect her wishes to be fulfilled immediately and by me, I could hardly go to the toilet undisturbed earlier.
After this I rested. We agreed with you that you will come with the other Ági, when time comes. I was napping, you came, some time passed, fluids were coming out of all wholes over my body, I think I even took a bath, but I think no real dilation was happening.
Peter brought a bit of cake, which was my favorite then, so that I could gain some energy. But after the first bite, it all came out, too. You ate it with appetite (it was nice to see it).
It was great, Ági massaged and poulticed my aching sacrum. I cried from time to time, wished that I was doing something else. You said that this baby will come out now, no matter what. The time passed, I was dilated but not enough, I didn’t believe that the baby would come out there, where it once entered, even though I really wanted it to, but by then I was already completely humiliated by the hospital, not believing that I can do this at all.
Then you said (it was evening again) that we need to fracture the caul and you kept listening to Anna’s enthusiastic heartbeat. You fractured the caul, but there was no progress, even though the only progress we waited for was the baby to come out.
You said that you would escort me to hospital, where my doctor worked, you promised that I would get only a small amount of oxytocin. I raged that I would be slaughtered again in the hospital, like a pig. You promised I wouldn’t be. I can say now that I didn’t believe it then, even though it didn’t happen. As soon as we arrived, in about 15 minutes, Anna was born (there was no need for oxytocin finally, the cobblestoned roads did their job probably).
We were greeted kindly, the midwife was careful, they didn’t perform an episiotomy, even though I was instructed to lay on my back. I was examined later on, to make sure the uterine wall did not break along the scar, but nothing mattered to me then, after she was born and not ripped out of me, they gave her to me, didn’t cut the cord before time, I could hug her and they asked if I would like that they wash her. I said no and so they didn’t, but they gave her to me.
We could go home after 2 hours of observation time (Annika nursed meanwhile) and since I was very hungry, I could eat a lot from my mother’s stew soup. This happened on the 21st in the morning.
And thank You once again!
Véletlenül kiválasztott mesék.
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